the wrong kind of love #36

Chapter 36Mandy looked at Nicky and got up, “Well, I suppose I’d better get going then!” she sighed.“Mandz, why don’t you just stay here? This is your house too. Only until you find yourself somewhere else if you really want to get away from here! I just feel terrible that you have to move out, or that you feel you have to move out!” he sighed.Mandy shook her head, “I can’t Nix. I cannot live here and see you every day and not be able to…be…with you. It’s too hard. It’s too painful!” Nicky looked at her, “I really am sorry, you know? I really am. I wish things could be different. I wish I could just say, HA! Gotcha!”“Yeah, so do I. I would have to kill you of course, but its better than feeling like this!” she moaned with a weak smile.Mandy smiled softly and walked up to her, hugging her. He then pulled away and looked at her, “Do you think…Could we be friends?”Mandy thought about this and sighed, “I am still very bitter about all this Nicky. I don’t really know if friendship will work!” she sighed.Nicky frowned, “Yeah, of course. You’re bound to be feeling bitter. I cannot say I blame ya really. But in time the bitterness will go. Do you think we could be friends then?” he questioned, brushing her hair back.Mandy sighed and looked at him straight in the eye, closing her eyes as she felt his hands on her hair, “We’ll see Nicky!”Nicky put his hands on her arms as he slid them down her face, neck and shoulders, he looked her in the eye and saw Mandy’s eyes closing. He then gave her a peck on the lips, “I love you Mandz. I’ll never stop loving you!” he whispered.Mandy opened her eyes and just stared at him. They looked silently at each other for a few seconds before Mandy threw herself in his arms and started kissing him. Nicky reacted immediately. He frantically rubbed his hands all over her body, lifted her slightly from the floor and moved her around the room, finally pinning her against the wall. He started kissing her neck roughly as she moaned softly.“We could have this everyday, Nicky. Please say you have changed your mind!” she muttered, leaning her head to the side and rubbing her hands over his gelled hair.That brought Nicky back to his senses. He pulled away, putting Mandy down first, and ran his hands through his stiff hair, taking a few steps back, “What am I doing?” he gasped, “What the fuck am I doing? What is fucking wrong with me?” he now screamed, walking back to the living room. Mandy watched him with her mouth wide open and followed him with her eyes. She then closed her eyes and banged her head softly back against the wall, “Shit!” she cursed to herself.She then pushed herself of the wall and followed him in. She found him sitting on the sofa, covering his mouth, leaning slightly forwards and rocking back and forth.“Nicky!” she whispered, sitting next to him.“I am sorry Mandz. I really don’t know what came over me!” he sighed.“How can you say you are gay and then do that?” she asked calmly.Nicky got up and nervously paced around the room, “God I dunno. See what I mean about being confused? What the fuck am I Mandz? What the bloody hell is wrong with me?” he cried.Mandy just stared at him hovering around the room.“I mean, I know I fancy men. I do know that much! I am certain of it. Yet I see my opportunity to kiss you and take you and I took that chance. Am I gay or not?” he shouted exasperatedly, banging his hands to his sides.“Only you know that Nix!” she sighed, leaning back on the sofa.“I’m a freak, is what I am! The world’s biggest fucking freak!” he hissed.“You’re not a freak, Nicky. You’re just, as you said, confused. I suppose it’s only normal!” she sighed, trying to understand.Nicky just shook his head, “I don’t know what to do, Mandy. I just don’t know what to do. I hate myself for what I have done to you. I hate myself so much! I hate myself for not knowing who or what I am! I just really hate myself. I really do!” He threw himself down on the sofa, covered his face with his hands and started sobbing. Mandy sighed and edged closer to him and put her arm on his back. She then pulled him against her and hugged him soothingly.“Don’t cry Nix. Please!” she squeaked, feeling her own tears rolling down her cheeks.Nicky ignored her and continued sobbing, soaking her shirt.“I just wish someone could tell me what to do, coz I don’t have a fucking clue!” he continued sobbing, his voice muffled from his hands.“I know, but it is only normal to be confused. You know you love men, and you love Charlie!” she sighed. She closed her eyes, hurting from just saying that.“I know, but I love you too!” he whispered.“Yeah, but in a different way. Love has many different definitions, Nicky. And you love me like you would love your sister!” she explained.Nicky frowned and nodded.“Right, then. There’s your answer. You know who and what you are. You know how you feel!” she sniffed.Nicky looked at her and wiped her tears away with his thumb, “I am really going to miss you being around, you know?”Mandy smiled and weak smile, “I am gonna miss you too Nicky!”Nicky rubbed his hands along her cheek, “Are you going to be ok?” he whispered.Mandy nodded, “Are you?”He simply shrugged, “I’ll survive!”Mandy nodded “Ok then. I am going to go up and pack some of my stuff and then I’ll leave, ok?”Nicky frowned and nodded, “The offer is still there if you want to stay here!”Mandy shook her head, “Thanks but no. It would only make things worse and more confusing. And we’ll end up hating each other. It’s best this way!”“I understand!” sighed Nicky with a nod.Mandy nodded and then went upstairs to pack most of her belongings and to start her new life.

the wrong kind of love #35

Chapter 35Mandy took a very deep breath before she opened the door. She put the key in the lock and slowly opened it. She walked into the silent house and straight into the living room. Nicky straightened up on the sofa when he saw her. Mandy stared at him. “Mandy!” he gasped.“Morning!” she mumbled, huffing inside.Nicky got up and walked over to her, “I have been so worried about you!”Mandy shrugged his hands away, “Well, there was no need. I was very well looked after!” she snapped.Nicky sighed, “Mandy, please. We need to talk about this!”Mandy had avoided looking at him. She couldn’t! She felt really uncomfortable under his stare.“I know we do. That’s why I am here!” she sighed, taking a seat on the sofa.“Do you, erm…Do you want a drink or something?” he offered.Now is when she looked at him. His eyes were red and swollen from all the crying he had done. He had dark rings under his eyes from lack of sleep and his skin had a grey tinge to it.“I can get it myself you know? This is my house too…well…It was!” she sighed.“It still could be babe!” he muttered.Mandy stared at him, “Do you honestly think we could live together, after what I have found out about you? What kind of fantasy world do you live in?” she snapped.“Well, some couples manage it!” he shrugged.Mandy could not believe her ears. She could not believe he was actually being serious, “get serious Nicky! This is real life, not some soap opera on BBC1! I have just found out you’re gay and you have a lover. You think we can live together like one happy family? Like we were never married? What’s next, you’ll being your lover in here and expect me to get on with him, I suppose!”Nicky sighed and bowed his head down, “So what are you going to do?”“Well, the house is yours isn’t it? It is under your name and the company is renting it out to you, so that means I have to move out!” she shrugged.“And where will you go?” he asked.“Fuck knows!” she mumbled, “But for now I am staying at Brian’s until I find myself somewhere to live. Now that I am getting an income, I suppose it will be easier!”“I bet he is loving all this, isn’t he?” snarled Nicky.Mandy quickly looked at him, “What is THAT supposed to mean?” she asked defensively.“Ah come on Mandz. He has been wanting to split us up for a while now!” he argued.“Brian did not split us up. You did that all by yourself!” she snarled, “I should have listened to him when he told me. Like an idiot, I turned against him and stuck by you. God, what an arse I am!”“I really am sorry Mandz. I really am. I wish it could be another way. I wish I could take your pain away. I just wish…I wish there was something I could do, but I just cannot ignore my feelings and I cannot change. This is the way I am, it is not something I can help!” he moaned.“It’s not the fact that you are gay that upsets me, Nicky. Well, it does, but that’s not what angers me. It’s the fact that you didn’t tell me, and lied to me all those years. And that you cheated on me!” she sighed.“Yeah, but I couldn’t help the way I felt about him!” he whined.“Dammit Nicky. Did you hear what I said?” she hit the armrest of the sofa in frustration, “I don’t give a fuck about what side of the road you drive on. I don’t care whose team you bat for. You still cheated on me. You still had someone behind my back. It still fucking hurts!” she shouted with tears in her eyes.Nicky looked at her. He wanted to go over and hold her in his arms until she felt better. But he thought better of it. She would only push him away, “I know babe. I am so sorry. So sorry! I didn’t mean for it to happen that way!” he sobbed.“Then why did it?” she bawled.“Oh I dunno. It just happened. I tried to stop it, Mandz. Really, I did. But I couldn’t. Before I knew it…” he sighed and shook his head, wanting to spare her the details, “I felt so bad about it. So ashamed. I couldn’t face you. I couldn’t? Well, how could I, knowing what was going on?” he got up and paced around the room, wiping his tears.“So that’s why you were always at work!” she whispered, drying her eyes.Nicky wiped his eyes again and nodded, bowing his head down to the floor.“And was he there with you?” she squeaked.“Does it even matter?” he whispered.“It does to me!” she growled.Nicky sighed and nodded, “Sometimes!”Mandy sighed and put her head on her hands. They stayed silent for a while. She heard the phone beeping, indicating there was a message. She opened it and read it.How is it going? Luv B xxxMandy closed the message and looked at Nicky as she fidgeted with her phone. He was now sat down with his head on his hands..“Why didn’t you just tell me in the first place, Nicky? I mean, before you started this affair with Charlie?” she sighed, slightly calmer.Nicky was about to answer, when he phone started ringing. Mandy looked at it and rejected the call. She looked back at Nicky and raised her eyebrows. He opened his mouth to talk again when the phone started ringing again. Mandy looked at it and saw Brian’s name displayed on the screen. She sighed angrily and answered it, “Dammit, I cannot fucking talk right now, ok? Get the fucking hint!” she screamed at it.Nicky stared at her in shock. Never in the 4 years they had been married, had he witnessed one of her moods like that.“I am sorry love. I was just worried about you!” answered Brian, slightly taken aback by her snapping.“I am fine. Now see you later!” she sighed and hung up. She looked at Nicky again.“Well?” she questioned.“How could I tell you, Mandy. how? It’s not exactly an easy thing to admit to. I just kept telling myself I would, but I kept putting it back and putting it back, and the more I waited, the harder it got to tell you!” he sighed.Mandy sighed, “How long have you known you were gay?”Nicky sighed and got up, pacing around the room nervously, “When I was 16…”“THAT LONG???” she shrieked loudly, getting up in shock.Nicky looked at her and sighed, “Let me finish!”Mandy nodded and sat back down.“When I had just finished my GCSE’s, I used to have all these feelings about the boys in my class. At first I just thought I looked up to them. I just thought that I admired them. But over time, I realised that what I felt was much more than admiration. I found myself wishing that the guys would feel the same way for me as I did for them. But again, I thought it was just puberty. That it was just part of growing up. I read magazines and stuff and apparently all teenagers go through that phase, when they question their sexuality. I just thought it was a passing phase. But I was scared when I wouldn’t get over that phase. I was so scared than I could be gay. I guess I just forced myself into liking girls, just so I could be like all my friends. But I knew. I knew that what I was feeling for my friends was a lot more than admiration, and Oh God Mandz, that just terrified the shite out of me. But I had to fight those feelings. I would be teased, bullied, rejected and that thought alone really shit me up. So I just started dating all these girls, just to prove to myself that I could fancy them. And at one point it worked. I really thought I did fancy them. I was so relieved, Mandz. So relieved. I seriously thought I had changed!” he explained.Mandy stood staring at him with her mouth wide open, “And what changed?” she whispered.Nicky sighed and sat down, “While I was dating this girl, I realised that I used to fantasize more about his brother than about her. I had to break up with her!” he mumbled.“So what happened with me? If you knew then, why the fuck did you marry me?” she asked, raising her voice.“I went through phases Mandy. one moment I was certain I preferred men and other times I was positive I fancied girls. I suppose for a while I was bisexual. But I heard that we all go through all that at the beginning, because we are all confused, and coz we are trying to prove to ourselves that we are 100% straight.” He sighed, running his hands through his hair.Mandy stared at him, bowed her head down and shook it slightly.“When I met you, Mandz, I was genuinely attracted to you. I thought you were the most beautiful girl I had ever clapped my eyes on. And you still are. I thought you had changed me, that you had made me see the light and convinced me that I was straight. You took my breath away. I fancied you so much. And not for one or two days. But then…” he looked away and swallowed hard.Mandy looked at him with tears in her eyes, “Then what?” she sniffed, as a tear rolled down her cheek.Nicky wiped his eyes, got up and sat beside her. He grabbed her hand and rubbed his thumb softly across her palm. With his other hand, he lifted it up to her face and wiped away her tears, “Than I started getting my old feelings back!” he whispered.“Was that before or after we got married?” she asked, with a shaky voice.“Before!” he admitted shamefully.Mandy thought she heard wrong. She looked at him as he stared at her in shame.“Fucking hell Nicky, Why the fuck did you marry me then?” she shrieked as she quickly stood up.“Coz I needed to prove to myself that I was wrong. That was straight and that was the only way I could do that!” he cried.“So all through our married life, you knew you were gay?” she yelled.Nicky shook his head, “Not all of it, no. The first 3 years were just confusing. I still fancied you like crazy. Still wanted you. Still got those feelings that made me just want to grab you and make love to you, all day. Just like we always did. But I also started thinking about men in that way too. God I dunno. It’s all so confusing!” he whined, looking up at the ceiling. Mandy stared at him and frowned.“It’s only been the past few months that I knew for sure that I was fighting a losing battle. I have finally accepted who I am, Mandz. I have accepted I am gay and slowly I am starting to feel proud of who I am!” he continued.“I still don’t understand why you never told me!” she cried, “Could have saved me from so much pain!” “Everyone thinks you just fancy a member of the same sex when you are gay, Mandy. But that’s not true. I still fancied girls. I see a good looking girl and I can still fancy her. And that’s what made it all so confusing. Coz it makes me think, well, if I am gay, I wouldn’t fancy a girl. I know my attraction for men is a lot stronger, but I had to make sure. I had to make sure I was 100% positive that I was gay. I didn’t want to just come out with it and hurt you for nothing if I wasn’t gay in the end.” He explained.Mandy sat down, “And now you are positive that you are gay!” she checked.Nicky sighed and nodded.“And there is no way you’re going to change your mind about that!” she asked.“I’m sorry babe. I am 100% sure. This is who I am now!” he answered.

the wrong kind of love #34

Chapter 34Brian woke up in the morning before his alarm went off. All he thought about the entire night was Mandy, and how he had turned down her advances. Most of all, how she must be feeling. He could not even begin to imagine how she must have been feeling. HE sighed, pushed the duvet down with his feet and got up. He walked upstairs and straight into the bathroom. The house was silent. Everyone was still in bed. After his shower, he wrapped a towel around his waist and stood outside his room, where Mandy was sleeping. He needed to go in a get his clothes. He didn’t know whether to knock or just go in, but he didn’t want to wake her up. But what if she was indecent? He sighed and tapped lightly on the door, letting himself in. He slowly walked in, peeping first in case she was not decent. He looked at Mandy, fast asleep on his bed. Her leg was on top of the duvet and her arm under the pillow. He walked over to her, crouched down beside her and just watched her sleep. He leaned his head to the side slightly and smiled. Her hair was partially covering her face. He smiled again and moved the offending hair away, but he quickly pulled his hand away when he felt her stirring Slowly, Mandy started opening her eyes and looked at him confused.“Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you!” he whispered.Mandy just stared at him sleepily.“Did you sleep well?” he asked softly, finally brushing her hair back with his hand.Mandy just nodded. She stretched and looked at him again. Brian looked at her as she stretched, slightly turned on by her.He cleared his throat and looked at her face again, “I hope you don’t mind me being here, but I needed to get my clothes for work!” he smiled.“Your clothes are under the bed, are they?” she asked sarcastically.Brian smiled, “Nice to see you have a sense of humour first thing in the morning. Actually, I was just watching you sleep, wondering if you were ok!”“Well, I was sleeping weren’t I? What do you expect me to do, throw a hissy when I am sleeping?” she chuckled slightly.“Wow, you certainly are on a roll here!” he chuckled.“What time is it?” she yawned, stretching again. He had to look away from her to avoid the same reaction as earlier on. He looked at his wrist watch and coughed slightly, “Half past seven. Why don’t you get back to sleep?” he smiled.“Nah. I am awake now. I’ll just go and have a shower. Then I’ll get dressed and then I’ll go home and talk to Nicky!” she moaned.She sighed and pushed the covers back. Brian looked at her as she walked around wearing nothing but his t-shirt and her underwear underneath. He could just about make out the lacy white fabric of her knickers and busied his thoughts, for he was just wearing a towel around him. He gulped and looked away from her. It took all his strength not to grab her, lay her in bed and make love to her. He shook his head free from those thoughts and stopped her from going out. Mandy just stared at him, “You’ll need a towel!” he smiled, throwing a blue towel over to her. Mandy caught it, smiled and walked off to the bathroom. She returned 10 minutes later with the towel wrapped around her herself and one around her head. Brian looked at her as she went inside the bedroom.“Sexy outfit!” he winked at her, “You should wear that to work!”Mandy smiled and shook her head, “Nah. It’s the wrong colour!” she joked back.“Well, well. Someone’s in a much better mood today!” he chuckled. He walked over to her and hugged her, “It’s nice to hear you making jokes sweetheart!”Mandy hugged him back and then let go of him, “It’s only because I am nervous!”“About talking to Nicky?” he questioned.Mandy sighed and nodded.“Don’t be nervous love.” He soothed, rubbing her back. Mandy pulled away and looked at him.“I am so scared!” she whispered.“Scared of what, darling?” he asked.“Well, I am here in Dublin. All my family is in London, along with all my friends! The house we have is what the company gave to us, so Nicky would be the one to stay there. Where am I going to live? What am I going to do? I cannot afford to buy myself a house and renting is just as bad!” she fretted.Brian wondered if she would ever think about moving back to London, but he didn’t want to ask her. As if she had read his thoughts, she continued, “And I don’t want to go back to London. Not really!”“How come?” he asked, slightly confused.“Well, the cost of living over there is ten times worse. And I cannot handle it over here. I like it here!” she sighed.Brian sighed and grabbed her hand, “Mandz. You can stay here for as long as you want. You know that hun!”“That is very kind of you Brian, but I cannot stay here forever, can I? It’s not fair that you have to sleep on the sofa all the time!” she sighed.“Then I can sleep with you on my bed. There’s enough room for 2!” he half joked.Mandy smiled weakly, “Stop kidding around Brian. I am being serious!”“So am I!” he thought to himself. Instead, he smiled and looked at her, “You were more than willing to share it with me last night, love!” he winked.Mandy looked away uncomfortably, “Yeah. I am sorry about that. I was just…you know…”Brian laughed and pulled her in for a hug, “I know babe. I know. Anyway, don’t worry. We’ll thin of something. We’ll sort it all out!”Mandy nodded as Brian let go of her and stared at her, She was still wrapped up in that towel and all he wanted to do was remove the knot, let the towel drop down and touch her, Make love to her. Love her until she was happy again. He closed his eyes and freed his mind from all the erotic thoughts in it.“Anyway, I have to get dressed now.” She sighed.Brian nodded, “I’ll go down and make you a cup of coffee!”Mandy looked at the time, “Aren’t you going to be late?” Brian shrugged, “Do I look bothered?”Mandy sighed, “Brian, you could get into trouble!”“Relax. I have already rung Mark. He is going to cover for me ok? And Simon is in a meeting all morning anyway!” he laughed.Mandy nodded. Brian then left and she got dressed in the same clothes she had yesterday.15 minutes later, she walked down to the kitchen.“Do you think Simon is in his office now? I have to ring him and tell him I won’t be in today!” she said.Brian looked at the time, “Yeah, he should he in now!”“God, he’s gonna love me, isn’t he? Second day on the job and already claiming a day off!” she rolled her eyes.“Don’t worry love. Simon is a very understanding boss. He has been through a very horrible break up himself recently, I am sure he can sympathise and relate to you. Just explain the whole situation to him!” he advised.Mandy nodded and went to the phone. 5 minutes later, she reappeared in the kitchen.“Well?” asked Brian, putting the empty cups in the dishwasher. He then stirred Mandy’s coffee and gave it to her. Mandy grabbed it and blew on it, “He says its ok and to take as much time as I need!”“See? I told you!” he winked.Mandy sipped on her coffee and washed her mug when she was finished. Brian grabbed his keys and got up.Mandy looked at him, “You wouldn’t have a hairdryer, do you?”Brian gave her a look, “Do you think I’m a woman or something?” he chuckled.Mandy grinned, “Thought not. No worries. I’ll let my hair dry naturally. Won’t hurt, will it?”Brian smiled, “I have to go now babe. I’ll see you later, ok?” he smiled, kissing her cheek. Mandy nodded and watched him leave. She went to comb her hair. When she was finally ready, she went out to the car and drove away. She felt the butterflies in her stomach when she found herself nearing the house.“Ok, relax now Mandy!” she coached herself, “Just relax and be adult about this!”

the wrong kind of love #33

Chapter 33As soon as they got home, they were met by Kian in the living room. Mandy was in the hall hanging her jacket up and removing her shoes.“Hey Bri. Mandy came over looking for…” he stopped when he saw her walking in and smiled, “…But I see she has found you!”Brian smiled and nodded, “Any calls for me?”“your ma called earlier. Said she will call you tomorrow as she won’t be home tonight!” he shrugged.“Where’s Rach?” Brian asked as Kian sat down and flicked through the telly.“Oh, she’s staying round her place tonight. She said something about an early start tomorrow!” he shrugged.Brian looked at Mandy and laughed, “I just love he way those 2 communicate. They NEVER know what each other’s doing!”Mandy smiled as Kian grinned and turned his attention back to the TV.Mandy looked at Brian, “I am just going to use your bathroom ok?”Brian smiled and nodded, “Do you want anything to eat?”Mandy pulled a face and shook her head quickly, “I am not really hungry, thanks!”“How about a drink?” he offered.“Oh, um. Water please. Thanks!” she smiled weakly before she went up. Brian went to get the drinks and then returned to the living room.“So, what’s she doing here?” asked Kian, without taking his eyes away from the telly.“Her name is Mandy, Kino and she is staying round tonight. She’s had a huge bust up with her husband!” explained Brian.“Again?” gasped Kian.“It’s a bit more serious this time, mate. IN fact, it is very complicated.” He sighed.“So it is definitely over between them then!” he checked.Brian sighed and nodded, “I think you could very safely say that, yes!”“Which means that you can move in on her any time you want!” he grinned.“Kian, please. Some respect eh mate? She’s only just split up from him., I am not about to make a move on her. God knows how vulnerable she must be feeling!” he argued, rolling his eyes.“Why not? She’s a free agent!” he shrugged.“Coz it’s not right, that’s why! Her self esteem has just taken a nose dive. It’s way too soon. She might not even want to!” he sighed.“But she might be gagging for it too!” winked Kian, “And if her self esteem is so low, what better way is there to get her feeling good about herself?”Brian looked at him, sighed and shook his head, “Grow up Kino. There’s more to life than just sex you know?”“Yeah, only coz you ain’t getting any!” smirked Kian, taking a sip of his beer. He looked at the door and saw Mandy coming in. He shut up now, hoping she had not heard any of the conversation. He smiled at her and then looked at the telly again.“You ok, sweetheart?” smiled Brian, hoping himself that she hadn’t heard any of what they were talking about.Mandy sighed and nodded as she picked up her glass of water. She drank the whole lot and put the glass back down.“I am so tired!” she yawned.“Come. I’ll show you to my room!” smiled Brian.Kian snorted, “Yeah go on Mandz. He never gets to say that to many girls, and actually have them doing it!”Brian shot him an evil glance and put his hand on her back. Mandy looked at him and smiled. Then she looked at Kian and wished him a goodnight, which he just responded with a wink and a grin. They both walked upstairs and into his room.“I am sorry about Kian. You’ll get used to him, I promise!” he sighed, going to his drawer and pulling out a t-shirt.Mandy smiled and nodded.“Here, you can wear this to sleep with if you want!” he smiled, handing it to her.“It’ll probably be like a dress on me!” she tried to laugh. Brian just smiled at her, “Are you going to be ok?”Mandy nodded quickly, “I think so!”“Ok then. Goodnight babe!” he leaned closer to kiss her cheek, but Mandy turned her head around to kiss his other cheek and they ended up kissing on each other’s lips. Brian instantly pulled back and stared at her in shock. Mandy leaned in closer and started kissing his lips again, this time intentionally. Brian pulled back, “Mandy. No!” he whispered.“Why not?” she mumbled, now kissing his neck.Brian was enjoying this immensely. He tilted his head to the side so she could get better access. He was losing himself to her and his breathing became more shallow. Mandy kissed his lips again, and this time Brian responded. However, he soon snapped back to reality and pushed her away.“No Mandz. We cannot do this!” he panted.“Why not?” she sighed.“Coz we can’t. It’s just..wrong!” he frowned.“Great. SO first my husband is so repulsed by me that he becomes gay and now you don’t wanna know!” she moaned, banging her fist hard to her side.“Ah come on Mandz. It’s not like that!” he sighed, running his hands through his hair.“You were practically begging for me the other day!” she sighed impatiently, “What the fuck happened?”“Watch your language, Mandy.” he moaned.“Well?” she snarled.“You are feeling very vulnerable at the moment Mandz. Your head is a mess. You have just found out your husband is gay. Your self esteem has taken a huge battering. You are not thinking straight babe!” he tried to reason.Mandy bowed her head down and sighed.“I just don’t want to go taking advantage of you darling. That’s not m style. Sure I want you. God only knows how much. I always have. You know how strongly I feel about you. But at the moment you are far too confused to even think straight. You may think you want this, but is it really what you need? You’ll only wake in the morning regretting this, and I’ll be damned if I am letting that happen. It happened once before Mandy, and it hurt like hell hearing you saying what a mistake it was and how much you regretted it!” he explained.Mandy sighed and nodded.Brian grabbed her hands, “You do understand, don’t you?”Mandy swallowed hard and nodded.“OK then. I’ll let you go to bed now. Goodnight babe. I’ll see you in the morning!” he smiled, kissing her cheek. He left the room, leaving Mandy there sitting on the bed. With a heavy sigh, she removed her clothes, put the t-shirt on and crept into bed, falling asleep straight away.

the wrong kind of love #32

Chapter 32After a lot more arguing, Mandy heard enough and she stormed out of the house. She got straight in the car and sped off. Nicky sighed and sat down on the sofa. He knew running after her would just be pointless. He never intended on hurting her the way he did, but he couldn’t help the way he felt. He put his head on his hands and cried silently.Mandy continued driving until she got to Brian’s house. She knocked frantically on the door and she heard Kian before he opened it.“Woah, hang on there speedy! At least give me time to…” he stopped when he saw Mandy standing there in a state, “OH, hello!”“Is Brian here?” she cried, wiping her tears away.“Are you ok?” he asked, putting his hand on her shoulder.Mandy rolled her eyes and sniffed, “I need to see Brian!”“I’m sorry love. But he is not here yet! He has not yet come back from work!” he answered sympathetically.“Ok, thanks!” she said before she ran back to her car.“Hang on. You can wait here for him if you want!” he yelled after her. He saw her getting into the car and speeding off.“…Or not!” he added with a shrug. He shook his head and closed the door.Mandy parked the car in the car park outside the pub and quickly walked inside. She was still in tears and frantically searching for Brian in the crowded pub. Everyone was giving her strange looks, but she didn’t care. All she wanted to do was find Brian and cry into his arms. He was the only one she could talk to. Brian walked out of the gents, singing along to the song that was playing, when he caught a glimpse of Mandy, walking around and looking lost. He did not fail to notice the state she was in either. He just stopped walking and looked at her.“Mandy?” he whispered. He soon reacted and ran over to her. He grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him.“Sweetheart. Are you ok?” he asked, full of concern, “What happened?”Mandy stared at him before she flung her arms around his neck.“Brian!” she whimpered.Brian just held her as she sobbed loudly against his chest. He closed his eyes and hugged her a bit tighter. After 5 minutes, she pulled away and wiped her eyes, “I’m sorry!” she croaked.“Don’t be!” he shook his head, “Tell me what happened!”“He admitted everything to me!” she cried, “He even told me he loves him!”“Him?” he gasped, “He’s in love with a bloke?”Mandy looked at him quickly, “I thought you knew!”Brian stared at her, “My mate from accounts told me he was with Charlie!” he gasped.“Aha! Charlie…a bloke!” she cried.“Oh! I just thought…I thought Charlie was Charlene…you know, her name in short!” he whispered.Mandy shook her head, “NO. I can guarantee you, Charlie is a bloke. A man. Charles! OH god!”“Oh babe!” he sympathised, pulling her into another hug, “Why didn’t you tell me?”“Coz I thought you knew!” she squeaked.“So what happens now?” he asked.Mandy shrugged, “He wants to remain friends, but I don’t think I can actually do that. He says he cannot help the way he feels. But I don; think I can forgive him!”“Honey, don’t you think it is better staying as friends? He cannot control his feelings babe!” he reasoned, thinking differently of Nicky now.Mandy stared at him, “He cheated on m Whether it was with a bloke or with a woman, he cheated on me. I cannot forgive him for that!”Brian shrugged, “I guess I cannot blame you, really. I mean, I would probably be like that too. But you have had something special together for 6 years. Are you just going to throw it all away?”“He has been lying to me for all those years Brian. Our 6 years together were lived in a lie. It cannot be all that special!” she argued.Brian stared at her and grabbed her hand, “Babe. I know you are hurting. And I know you are angry and you have every right to be. But you need to have a good long chat with him about what happens next!”Mandy bit her lip and shrugged, “Just talking to him hurts, Brian!” she squeaked, releasing a new load of tears.Brian kept hold of her hand, “Oh I know it does sweetheart. But it has to be done. You need to sort this out!” he kissed her shaking hand.Mandy sighed and nodded, “I suppose you’re right!”“Good girl!” smiled Brian.“But not tonight. I cannot face him tonight!” she added.“That’s fine. Where are you staying tonight?” he questioned.“I’ll book myself into a hotel or something!” she shrugged, “All I know is that u cannot go home. Not tonight!”Brian shook his head, “You’re staying with me!” he stated.“Brian!” she sighed.“Hey, no. Don’t worry. As friends. Nothing more. I’ll sleep on the sofa. You can sleep in my bed!” he offered.“I cannot do that Brian!” she sighed.“Of course you can. I only changed the sheets this morning! It’s clean!” he winked jokingly.Mandy smiled amongst her tears, “It’s not that. it’s just…I’ll be ok in a hotel, honest!”“You are not wasting your money on a hotel room and that is final. You are sleeping at mine and I don’t want to hear another word about it!” he insisted.Mandy sighed and nodded, “Thanks Bri!”He smiled and pulled her in for another hug.“There you are. I have been looking everywhere for you” came a voice from beside them. Brian and Mandy pulled apart to see Sam and Shane standing there.Brian looked at her and smiled, “Sorry. I had an emergency!” he said, nudging his head towards Mandy.“It’s my fault, Sam. Sorry!” she sniffed.Sam looked at her, “Hey it’s ok. Are you ok? Didn’t you leave?”“I have been better. And yes I left and now I am back!” she frowned.“Awwwwww hun, it cannot be that bad!” she sympathised.“It is. And worse!” she sighed.Sam looked at Brian, who just shook his head, signalling to stop talking about it.She gave her a sympathetic smile and then looked at Brian, “Shane and I are off now!”“Oh, so it’s you two then. I wondered what that funny smell was!” he grinned.Sam looked at him and slapped his arm hard, “Don’t be so cheeky McFadden!”Brian just laughed and shook his arm, “Sorry. I couldn’t help it!”“I’ll see you tomorrow ok?” she laughed.Mandy nodded. Brian got up and shook Shane’s hand, “See ya mate. Drive safely!”They walked off and Brian sat back down, staring at Mandy.“Feeling any better?” he asked.“Not really!” she frowned.Brian sighed. He was about to say something when he heard the phone ringing. Mandy dug into her bag and fished her phone out. She looked at Caller ID and frowned.“Is it him?” asked Brian.Mandy bit her lip and nodded, but didn’t answer it.“Well, aren’t you going to answer it?” he asked.“I dunno!” she whispered.Brian snatched it off her hands, pressed the reply button and handed it back to Mandy, “Talk to him” he mouthed.Mandy looked at him as she slowly put the phone to her ear, “H-hello!” she stammered.Brian stared at her as she frowned, “NO, I am not ok Nicky…I don’t give a shit how sorry you are…stop fucking apologising, will ya? And stop saying you love me. You cannot love me that much…. How the fuck could you possibly love me?… No, I do not understand!”Brian massaged her shoulder when he noticed the state she was getting in again. Soon she calmed down and leaned her head back, “NO…I am not coming home tonight…Coz I cannot face it and I cannot face you, that’s why…I am staying at a friends…Yes, that’s right, at Brian’s, you have a problem with that?” she asked, staring at Brian, who just carried on massaging her shoulders. He then rubbed her back soothingly.“Yes ok. I’ll go over tomorrow morning and we’ll chat, ok?…Fine, see you tomorrow then. Goodbye!” she hung up and dried her tears.“That seemed tense!” grimaced Brian.“It was!” she frowned.“OH honey. I really wish there was something I could do!” he sighed, “I feel so helpless!”Mandy looked at him as she placed her hand on top of his, “You are doing enough Brian. Just by being here for me, that means the world to me. Thank you!”Brian shook his head, “I just wish I could make all your pain and fears go away. I hate seeing you like this. It hurts me too!” he sighed.Mandy smiled at him, “You’re sweet. I am just grateful that you are still here after the way I have treated you!” she smiled weakly.Brian smiled back, “How could I ever turn you away?” he whispered, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear and staring deep into her eyes.Mandy looked at him, “You told me not to turn to you if things went pear shaped!” she reminded him.“When did I say that?” he gasped.“When you came into my house after we had slept together!” she further reminded him.“Meh. That was just the green eyed monster coming out of me. I was an idiot. Like I could ever turn my back on you!”Mandy had this overwhelming urge to kiss him there and then, but she fought against it. It wouldn’t be a good idea and she would only lead him on. He had been too nice already and she felt it wasn’t fair on him. Instead she just smiled at him.“Are you really ok with me crashing at yours tonight?” she asked softly.Brian smiled and rubbed her cheeks, “Of course I am, princess. I hve always wanted to try out that sofa bed anyway!” he joked.Mandy smiled and leaned her cheek against his hand.“Well, I suppose we’d better get going then!” he smiled, checking the time and getting up, “Before we get kicked out!”

the wrong kind of love #31

Chapter 31Mandy stood outside her front door, dreading going in. Her stomach was in knots and her heart beat was rapid. Of course, she knew what Nicky wanted to talk about, but she just worried about how she was going to react and deal with the situation. She swore to herself she wouldn’t cry. Whether she could keep that promise was another story. Taking a deep breath and exhaling, she opened the door and walked in. When she walked into the living room, she saw Nicky pacing around nervously. That’s when she realised this was just as bad for him as it was for her. She looked at him and put her bag on the sofa.“Hey!” she whispered, standing there.“Mandy!” he smiled nervously, “How was work?”“Interesting. It has been a very interesting day today. Full of new…revelations!” she answered, studying his reaction.Nicky looked at her curiously. Mandy wanted to tell him she knew about all his shenanigans before he announced it himself, just to have one over him. But at the same time, she wanted to see him squirm.“Oh, right!” he answered, “Well, anyway. I needed to talk to you about something…delicate!”He tugged nervously on his collar and banged his fists together, swinging his arms round his waist and back.Mandy stared at him. She closed her eyes and tried to contain her beating heart. She was pretty sure he could hear it from where he was standing, “Yeah. I found out so many new things today!” she repeated.Nicky stared at her for a brief moment before he continued.“I have been wanting to tell you this for a very, very long time now, but I just never found the courage!” he added.“That’s what I love about working. All the gossiping!” she smiled, not paying any attention to him.“But I have to tell you now coz it is killing me. It is really tearing me apart and I cannot go on any longer. I cannot live like this anymore!” he sighed.“Not always good news though!” she added on her own topic of conversation.Nicky stared at her, “Are you even listening to me?”“Are you listening to me?” she shrugged.“Mandz, I am trying to tell you something here and it is very difficult for me!” he sighed.“Oh rubbish. How can it be so hard to tell someone you’re married to that you’re having an affair with someone from work?” she hissed.Nicky stared at her and blinked, “What?” he gasped.“You heard!” she sneered.“But…How…” he stammered, lost for words.“How do I know?” she questioned.Nicky just stared at her.“Just put it this way, Nicky. You have your lover in your office, make sure that you either 1/ lock the door completely and not leave it slightly open, or 2/ make sure your secretary is outside!” she snarled.Nicky bowed his head down and sighed.“I gave you the chance to admit this to me last week. Yet you still lied to me!” she growled with tears in her eyes. She fought to keep them in. She tried so hard to keep her own promise of not crying in front of him.Nicky sighed and sank down on the sofa, “I am so sorry!” he whispered, with tears in his eyes, “I didn’t want you to find out that way. Oh god, I so didn’t want you to find out like that!”“I asked you straight out if you were having an affair. You looked deep into my eyes and said no!” she gave up on her promise and let her tears out. They spilled rapidly down her cheeks, “And what’s more? You got really offended that I had asked you!”Nicky sighed and wiped his own tears away.“How long has it been going on Nicky?” she asked.“Does it matter?” he mumbled.“Of course it fucking matters!” she screamed, “It matters to me!”“4 weeks!” he admitted in shame.“So more or less when you started working there!” she sighed, “When we got to Dublin. Didn’t waste much time, did ya?”“We had already met before in conference meetings and business trips” he answered, “So we knew each other pretty well!”“Was that the reason you wanted to get promoted so badly?” she moaned.Nicky bit his lip and nodded slowly, “Partly, yes! But I did also genuinely want that promotion for the extra responsibilities!”“So all this staying late after work shite was all a load of bollocks then was it?” she spat.“Not always, no!” he shook his head, with his head still hung down.Mandy paced around the room furiously, “You made me believe you were really working later, when all the time you were fucking Charlie around! I slaved over you, making you dinners so that I could throw it away hours later. I treated you with nothing but respect, Nicky. I fucking loved you Damn it!” she screamed.“Oh god, Mandy. I love you too baby. But I cannot help the way I feel! It’s not something I can control!” he cried.“Well, maybe you should!” she screamed at him. She had a sudden thought and turned around, “Your last business trip!”Nicky looked up at her quickly, panic stricken, “What about it?”“That was no business trip, was it?” she croaked.“Yes it was. It was a business trip!” he sighed.“Which you used as a holiday to take that…that…” she hissed.Nicky sighed and looked down.“You took your lover on a break? ON OUR FUCKING ANNIVERSARY???” she screamed loudly.“I am so, so sorry Mandy. I really am. Please…” he cried.“How fucking insensitive can you be? You couldn’t control your itching cock for one day? For one fucking day? Our special day? Have you no self-control? Do you not care for me at all?” she screamed, walking up and down and finally to hi, slapping his arms hard.“Don’t say that, Mandy! You know how much I love you!” he cried, defending himself from her slaps.“Yeah, you love me so fucking much that you go running to someone else’s arms at night!” she snarled, “OH god, to think I had you making love to me after shagging…shagging…THAT!!!”Nicky got up and paced around the room, “Look, I don’t know why I did what I did, ok? I cannot help the way I feel. I wish I could, but I can’t. You want an answer, but I cannot give you one. OK, so I lied to you. I betrayed you. But I had my reasons for that!” he shouted in frustration.“4 years, Nicky! 4 fucking years we’ve been married. 4!!! 6 years together. HOW???” she screamed.“I don’t know!” he whined loudly, sitting down again with his head in his hands, “I am not proud of myself about this, Mandz. Not at all!”Mandy sighed and sat down aswell. She put her head on her hands in the same way as Nicky and rocked back and forth, “This is such a mess!” she cried.“I know!” he whispered.Mandy removed her hands from her face and looked back. Her eyes were glistening with tears. Her cheeks were bright red and her lips seemed swollen from all the crying.“So…What happens now?” he finally asked, merely in a whisper.“I dunno!” she shrugged.“Well. What do you want?” he asked.“I think I am the one who should be asking YOU that!” she muttered.Nicky sighed, “I am so confused at the moment!”“Well, join the fucking club!” she snapped.“Please don’t be like this Mandz! I was hoping we could do this amicably!” he sighed.Mandy stared at him, laughing slightly with shock, “Friends? Are you having a laugh?”Nicky looked at her, rolled his eyes and looked down again.“How on EARTH could you possibly believe that would ever happen. Huh? You cheated on me, Nicky. You’re shagging someone else behind my back, and you expect me to remain buddies with you?” she screamed.Nicky sighed and got up, “You’re still very, very special to me, Mandz. Nothing has changed, only the fact that I am in love with someone else right now!”“In love?” she gasped.Nicky realised what he had said and shook his head, hoping the ground would swallow him up.“You’re in love? Fucking hell, Nicky. I only thought you were shagging. Not for one second did I think it could be love!” she gasped with tears in her eyes.“Yeah, well. As I said, nothing has changed. My feelings for you are still there!” he sighed.“Oh, a lot more than that has changed, Nicky. And you know it!” she grunted.Nicky stared at her, “I still love you though!”Mandy got up furiously, “Will you stop saying that?” she screamed.“Well, I do!” he repeated, raising his voice, “Nothing and noone has ever changed the fact that I do actually love you!”“No. Only the fact that you have fallen in love with another man and there is fuck all I can do about it!” she spat!

the wrong kind of love #30

Chapter 30Brian kept a close eye on Mandy all day. Every now and then he saw her wiping her eyes, possibly getting rid of a few tears. He wanted to go up to her and hold he in his arms, telling her that everything would be ok, but he didn’t want to seem too pushy. He knew she needed her space. When the day was over, he watched her as she tidied up her desk. He switched off his computer, grabbed his jacket and walked over towards her.“Hey. How are you feeling?” he asked, putting a sympathetic arm around her shoulder.“Very nervous about confronting him tonight!” she frowned.Brian squeezed her shoulder slightly as a form of encouragement and support.“This is so hard!” she whined, “I don’t know if I can do it!”“Of course you can. You’re a strong woman Mandy. Even I know that!” he smiled encouragingly.“My stomach is in knots. I feel physically sick!” she moaned.Brian stared at her, “Sam and I are going to the pub for a few drinks. Her bloke is coming too. Why don’t you join us?” he asked.“Oh, I don’t think I am in the mood Brian, but thanks!” she sighed.“Oh come on. A bit of Dutch courage!” he nudged her with a smile, “And I don’t wanna play gooseberry to Sam and Shane. Come on. I’ll get the drinks!”Mandy looked at him and sighed, “I really cannot face it!”“And what are you going to do? Go home and worry yourself sick? Come on, take your mind off it for an hour or so. You said yourself you need to keep yourself busy. Being at home will only make you think!” he insisted.Mandy stared at him and sighed without saying anything.“I’ll buy you a packet of dry roasted peanuts!” he jokingly bribed.Mandy laughed weakly, “Ok, ok. But I won’t stay long, alright?”“Good girl!” he grinned, hugging her tightly. Mandy rested her head against his chest and sighed deeply.“Ok Bri. Are you ready?” smile Sam, standing beside him, putting her long suede jacket on.Brian smiled at her and nodded as he let go of Mandy, “Mandy is joining us if that’s ok!”Sam looked at Mandy and smiled, “That’s great. Shane will be meeting us there!”Mandy grabbed her bag and walked out with them. Brian kept the conversation going throughout the whole journey. He did not want Mandy to think about Nicky.“So she just put the papers on the table and told him to get stuffed!” chuckled Brian, “I tell ya, she has balls of steel this girl!”“Well, he was really pissing me off!” laughed Sam, “I hate people who think they are better than everyone else!”“He is your boss!” shrieked Brian with laughter.“Doesn’t make him God does it?” she smirked.They walked into the pub and sat down.Mandy smiled, joining in, “And he didn’t fire you?”“Oh, he cannot fire me! He knows what he stands to lose if he does.” She grinned.“Yeah, don’t be shy Sam! Whatever happened to modesty?” cackled Brian.“Oh come on Brian. Apart from you, Mark, and me noone else works as hard as us. IN fact, I am starting to question you now!” she grinned cheekily. She looked around the pub, “God, where is that boyfriend of mine?” she added with a groan.“Oh come on. I work my bollocks off and you know it!” laughed Brian.The waitress came and took their orders, after which they continued talking.“Look at Mike. All he does is play solitaire on the computer, the sad fuck! Linda, she files her nails and brushes her hair all day long, and oh my god, Larry might as well bring his bed to work!” laughed Sam, “Simon knows I work hard and he knew I had a good enough reason not to have done that assignment that day!”“So instead he got muggings here to do it!” said Brian, pointing to himself and looking at Mandy, who just giggled softly as she sipped her drink.“Hi, sorry I am late!” came a voice from above them. Everyone looked up to see Shane standing there all flustered.“Well, he finally decides to join us. About bloody time too babe!” Sam laughed.Shane smiled, took his jacket off and sat down. He looked a Mandy and grinned.“Shane. This is Mandy. She’s just started working with us! Mandy, this is my boyfriend Shane!” introduced Sam.“Hi Mandy. nice to meet you!” smiled Shane, extending his hand towards her.“Likewise!” smiled Mandy, grabbing his hand and shaking it politely.Brian looked at he when she let go, “Are you ok?” he whispered.Mandy sipped her drink and nodded.“Want another drink?” he offered, noticing her glass was empty.“Yes please!” she smiled.The drink was increasing her confidence and the thought of facing Nicky later on was not as daunting anymore. Brian got up and returned moments later with another round of drinks and a packet of dry roasted peanuts. Mandy laughed when he handed them to her.“I promised you a packet, didn’t I?” he grinned.Mandy laughed and opened them, offering them to the others. She softly felt her bag vibrating and fished out her mobile phone from her bag. She read the message.Hey babe. Where are you? Nicky xxxMandy sighed and looked at Brian, who was just staring at her.“Is it him?” he asked.Mandy swallowed and nodded, “He is wondering where I am!”“Ah, just tell him you are in the company of a really gorgeous male and about to shag him!” he winked teasingly.Mandy giggled and clicked on reply on her phone, “You’re mad!”At the pub with my work mates. Needed a few drinks. Back soon!A few minutes later she got another reply, Ok. Don’t be long. We need to talk!!!Mandy sighed and put the phone away. Noticing her worried look, Brian edged closer to he, grabbing her hand.“He wants to talk!” she sighed, looking at their fingers, which were now laced around each others.“I am assuming he is going to come clean!” he guessed.Mandy nodded, “I suppose I’d better go!”“Aren’t you going to finish your drink first?” he asked, wanting her to stay a bit longer.Mandy shook her head, “I don’t think I can. I just want to get this over and done with!”Brian sighed and nodded, “I’ll walk you out!”“No need, Bri. I’ll be fine!” she sighed.“It’s ok. I don’t mind!” smiled Brian, “I’ll give these two lovebirds some time alone too!”Mandy grinned. She got up and put her jacket on. She put her bag on her shoulder and looked at Sam, “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then!”“Sure thing Mandy. Safe journey home!” she smiled, leaning her head against Shane’s chest. Shane smiled and kissed the top of her head.“Nice to meet you Mandy. Take care!” smiled Shane.Mandy smiled and nodded, “Thanks. You too!”Brian out his hand on her back and let her out. When they got to her car, they stopped and looked at each other.“Are you sure you’re gonna be alright?” he checked.Mandy bit her lip and shrugged, “Probably not. But I’ll cope…somehow!”Brian looked at her in pity, “Want me to go with you?” he whispered, lowering his head slightly to meet her eyes with his.Mandy shook her head, “NO. This is something I have to do alone. But thanks!”Brian nodded.“God I am so nervous!” she shivered.Brian put his hands on her arms and rubbed them up and down, “Be strong Mandz. You show him that you’re made of much better stuff. I have faith in you. Don’t take any shit from him! You’ll be fine!”Mandy sighed and nodded, “I wish I shared your confidence!”Brian pulled her in for a tight embrace, staying like that for a while, “Believe in yourself babe. You’re so much better than he’ll ever be! Chin up chick!” he smiled.Mandy pulled away and looked at him, “Thanks for this Bri. I certainly do not deserve you after the way I have treated you!”Brian shrugged “You were in denial babe! I don’t blame you for not wanting to believe it was true. But you got annoyed with me coz deep down you knew I was right. I understand totally, honey!” he smiled.Mandy smiled and hugged him tightly, “Thank you for not giving up on me!” she whispered with tears in her eyes.“You’re far too good a person to give up on hun! And don’t you ever forget that!” he smiled.Mandy pulled away and smiled at him. She kissed him lightly on the lips and then got into her car. She opened the window and looked at Brian as she started the car.“Wish me luck!” she sighed.“You’ll be ok sweetheart! Call me if you need anything ok? Let me know how it goes. Good luck darling!” he smiled.Mandy nodded and started driving off, “See ya!”“I am here for you all the way!” he called out after her.Mandy put her hand out of the window as an indication that she had heard him and then sped off into the distance. Brian lifted his arm to wave goodbye to her. When she was just a dot on the horizon, he sighed, stuffed his hands in his pocket and walked back to the pub to join Sam and Shane!

the wrong kind of love #29

Chapter 29Brian stared at her pale face and sighed, “how…How do you know?” he stuttered.“Coz I have just heard them!” she answered, “I stood outside his door and heard the whole conversation!” Her whole body was shaking and Brian noticed this. He walked closer to her and rubbed her back, “OH God babe. I am so sorry!” he sighed.Mandy snapped out of it and stared fixedly at him, “No you’re not!” she growled.Brian pulled back slightly, “What?”“You’re not sorry. You’re glad it happened. You wanted it to happen didn’t you? You kept wishing he would be cheating on me, and now he has. Well, are you fucking happy now Brian? Huh? Are ya?” she screamed.“What? No I did not want this to happen. I kept wishing that it wouldn’t. I kept hoping that I was wrong!” he argued, shocked by her outburst.“Yeah, like fuck you did. You fucking liar! You have admitted to me how you feel about me. You are so glad it happened, you’re practically giddy!” she started crying now and was starting to lose it.“Mandz, honey. Calm down!” he sighed.“Calm down? Calm down? You want me to calm down after seeing my fucking husband with someone else? How the fuck should I calm down eh? Answer me that one!” she yelled. Pacing around the room, chewing on her fingernails.Brian walked closer towards her. He wanted to hold her in his arms and say that everything would be ok. But she just pushed him back. When she realised how good that felt, she got nearer to him and started pounding her fists against his chest, “This is all your fault, you bastard. I hate you!” she screamed.Brian knew she was just in a state of shock. He grabbed her fists and stared at her, holding them tightly against his chest. Mandy looked up at his face and sobbed loudly, “How could he do that to me?”“Awww come here sweetheart!” he whispered. He palced one hand behind her neck and the other behind her back, bringing her closer towards his chest, where she just buried her face and continued sobbing. H e played with her hair as he held her and planted a kiss on top of her head. She continued crying, clinging onto him for dear life.“You let it all out darling! Let it all out!” he swayed her in his arms as she sobbed loudly. Simon heard everything from outside and decided to check what was going on. He opened the door and stared at Brian. Brian shook his held her tighter against him. He waved with is hands to leave. Simon pulled a face and walked back out.“What’s wrong with her?” he asked, looking at everyone.“Dunno boss!” shrugged Mark, “She went somewhere for her coffee break and came back in tears.!”Simon shrugged and walked back to his office. Mandy finally stopped crying and Brian pulled back slightly, “Feeling better?”“Not really!” she croaked, her voice strained from all the crying. She wiped her red swollen eyes and sat down. Brian walked over to the tap and poured some water into a glass. He gave it to Mandy and sat opposite her.“What did he have to say about it?” he asked.Mandy shook her head, “He doesn’t know I heard him! I ran away before he got the chance to see me!”“So he doesn’t know you know?” he checked.Mandy sighed and shook her head. He looked at her. She was still shaking.“I wish I could just stop fucking shaking!” she shivered.“It’s just the shock, love!” he smiled.Mandy nodded, “How the fuck am I going to deal with all this?” she sighed, running her hands through her hair and starting to cry again.Brian sighed, grabbed her hands and kissed them, “You need to sot him down and talk about it. Discuss what it is he wants, if it’s you or…” he started.“How am I doing to do that? He’s never at home!” she squeaked.“Well, then you come to the office and talk to him here. You have to make him talk, Mandz. Don’t let him make anymore excuses. This has been going on long enough!” he sighed.“How long have you know?” she asked him weakly.“2 days!” he shrugged with a sigh.“I see!” she nodded.Brian looked at her, “I tried to tell you, Mandz. I really did, but you just wouldn’t have any of it!” he sighed.Mandy bowed her head down, “I know. I just didn’t want to believe it. I guess I was just in denial. Deep down I knew too. It was just easier believing it wasn’t true!” she frowned, “I am sorry Bri!”“You will get past this babe. IN time…” he sympathised.“OH I dunno Brian. I don’t think I’ll ever get over this. We have been together for a long time now!” she sighed.Brian looked at her, “It may feel like that now. It may feel like that pain you are feeling right now will never go away, but soon, maybe in a few months time from now, you will feel better and you’ll be able to move on. You will start to look forward again!”Mandy felt the tears rolling down her eyes. She scrunched her face and started crying again, “Why the fuck did this have to happen? Why? I loved him so much!”Brian sighed and grabbed her hand, “It’s just one of those things honey. You don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve to be hurting the way you are hurting now. You don’t deserve him. You deserve so much better!”“I must have deserved it if it happened to me!” she cried.Brian shook his head and put his hand on her cheek, “You’re not the one in the wrong here Mandz. Never ever think that!”Mandy just shrugged and looked away. She took a sip of her water and looked at the door, “I guess I’d better get back to work now!” Brian turned her around and placed a thumb to her eyes to dry them, “Why don’t you go to Simon and explain the whole situation to him. I am sure he would understand and let you go home!” he softly said.Mandy shook her head, “NO. I need to stay. I have work to do!”“Mandz, you’re in shock, darling. You cannot work like this. Not in this state. Look at you for fucks sake. You cannot stop shaking!” he argued, holding her in his arms.Mandy pulled away and shook her head, “I need to keep myself busy. I need to take my mind off it. Being at home will only make me think and feel sorry for myself and I’ll drive myself nuts! I am much better off here!” she answered stubbornly.“Fine, ok. You win. But promise me something!” he sighed, lifting her chin up slightly with his fingers. She just stared at him and blinked.“If it all gets too much for you and you cannot bear it any longer, just let me know ok? I am here for you babe!” he smiled.Mandy smiled a very weak smile and nodded, “Thanks Bri. I will!”“Good girl!” he smiled in a whisper.Mandy turned around and walked out of the kitchen and back to her desk. Everyone stared at her and then back at Brian.“Is she ok?” whispered Sam.Brian shook his head, “Not really, Sam.”“What’s wrong with her?” asked Mark nosily.Brian sighed and stared at Mandy, who bravely answered the calls, “Let’s just say that my suspicions were right all along.”

the wrong kind of love #28

Chapter 28Back at work the next day, Mandy tried her best to avoid Brian , while he tried his utmost best to get her to talk to him. Every time he tried, or even went close to her desk, she answered a call, totally ignoring him. Brian muttered a soft “fuck” every time and walked back to his desk.“Fuck it!” he spat, logging onto his computer. Sam heard him and looked at him.“What’s up?” she laughed.Brian sighed and shook his head, “Nothing!” he mumbled, looking at Mandy and sighing.Sam looked at Mandy and then back at Brian, “Forget about her, Brian. She is married!” she sighed.“To a wanker! Have we not established that already?” he snapped.“You don’t know that!” she giggled.“Yes. Yes I do. And I also know what he is doing and who with! I know more about him than she does!” he snarled.“You know?” she gasped.Brian sighed and nodded.“Then why don’t you tell her?” she questioned.“Coz I don’t have any proof. And did you not tell me just the other day not to get involved?” he muttered.Sam sighed and nodded, “Well, you will be the one to lose out in the end if you do!”“How was the movies yesterday?” he sighed, changing the subject.“Meh. Shane got his own way and took me to see some crap about fighting. What is it with you men and those kind of films? I mean, do you need to see them just to feel all macho?” she moaned.Brian smiled, “The sight of blood makes us feel more like men!” he smirked jokingly.Sam giggled, “I can actually believe that. I ended up falling asleep on Shane’s shoulder!”“Oh dear!” smiled Brian.“Nah. Shane don’t mind. He actually prefers it that way. At least he wouldn’t have to put up with my constant questions!” she giggled.Brian laughed, “I love how close you actually are!” he said sarcastically.“Wouldn’t change him for the world!” she grinned, “Anyway how about you? How was the pub?” she asked.“Pretty quiet…Until I went home!” He sighed.“Why? What happened?” she asked curiously, “Pulled, did ya?” she winked, nudging him cheekily.“NO. I wish!” he sighed, “I knocked on Mandy’s door, declared my undying love to her, announced what a prat her husband is and then I punched him!” he shrugged, as if it was the most normal night ever.Sam’s mouth fell open, “You beat him up?” she gasped.“Well, he punched me first!” he answered defensively.“That explains the fat lip then. Why did he punch you?” she asked.“Coz I called him a dickhead!” he mumbled.“OH my god. Brian!” she gasped.“And coz I told Mandy that he doesn’t love her and I could give her one, which is something he doesn’t do!” he smirked.“Jesus Brian. What are you like?” she gasped.“He deserved it!” he mumbled.Sam just shook her head and sighed, “OH Brian!”“Bu he is a dickhead, though. The biggest one I know. He so does not deserve Mandy. Now she doesn’t even want to look at me, let alone talk to me!” he sighed.“I should imagine not!” she snorted, “You punched her husband for fuck’s sake. And insulted him!”“Who did you punch?” asked Mark, suddenly joining them.“Mandy’s husband!” sighed Brian, “And now she hates me even more than she already did!”Mark winced, “Oooh ouch. That lip doesn’t look too healthy mate!”Brian shrugged “No, I should think not. You should see what I did to his eye though!” he smirked.Mark saw Mandy heading to the kitchen for her break and then looked at Brian, “Now’s your chance. She has gone for her coffee. Go and talk to her!” she nudged him.“She don’t wanna listen to me, Mark!” he sighed.“Well, Make her listen!” he rolled his eyes, pulling him up. Brian sighed and looked at the kitchen.“And what do I say?” he asked softly biting his lip.“I dunno. Apologise and tell her you were drunk and you didn’t mean it! Just make something up. Just go!” insisted Mark, pushing him away.Brian shook his head and slowly made his way to the kitchen. He could feel his heart pounding against his chest and his mouth suddenly became dry. HE took a deep breath, exhaled, opened the door and walked in. Mandy looked at him briefly, sighed and got back to making her coffee.“Finished boasting to your mates about beating Nicky up last night, have ya?” she growled.Brian sighed and shook his head, “I was not boasting!”“No, course you weren’t!” she sneered, “Just coz I have that headset on does not mean I have lost my ability to hear, you know?”Brian shook his head, “I was only talking about what happened!”“What do you want, Brian!” she moaned.“I think we need to talk!” he shrugged.“I have nothing to say to you!” she answered coldly.“But I have plenty to say to you!” he insisted.“I am not even remotely interested in anything you have to say” she sighed, walking towards the door with the mug in her hand. Brian folded his arms and blocked the exit with his tall frame. Mandy stepped to the side and he did the same, denying her any access to the door.“Get the fuck out of my way Brian!” she sighed.“Not until you hear me out!” he answered defiantly.Mandy sighed and walked to the table. She put her mug of coffee down and then looked at Brian as she folded her arms and raised her eyebrows.“It was wrong of me to have gone to your house last night and do what I did. I admit that!” he started.“No kidding!” she spat.“Please Mandz. Do not interrupt me ok? This is hard enough as it is!” he sighed.Mandy nodded and continued staring at him.“I was drunk, Mandz. OK, so I did know what I was doing…The whole thing…but I was so drunk that I just didn’t give a shit. I would never have done that had I been sober. I swear!” he explained.“But you still did!” she hissed.“I’m sorry ok?” he sighed.Mandy continued staring at him, “Do you have any idea about the trouble you have caused?” she asked, tired of hearing his excuses.“I can imagine!” he mumbled.“NO. no you cannot imagine. Your pathetic excuse for an imagination just won’t let you to imagine. My husband slept in the spare bedroom last night because he was mad at me!” she growled.“Mad at you? Why?” he shrieked, looking at her with his eyes as wide as saucers.“Because he thinks I have been blabbing about our personal life and about my sex life to you!” she shouted, pointing at him and digging her finger onto his chest.Brian just stared at her, “But you have!”Mandy’s face changed. She started pacing around the room, trying to think of a come back. She was rendered speechless. She gave up though. He was right. She did talk about her sex life with him.“OK. Fair enough. I did. But he didn’t need to know that. I told you in confidence. Now he thinks I hate him and he won’t even talk to me. He thinks I have been slagging him off behind his back!” she grunted.“I’m so sorry babe!” he sighed, bowing his head down.“Sorry? You’re sorry? And do you think that Sorry is going to fix things? We had a full-blown argument last night, thanks to you. He will not return my calls, he will not speak to me...He won’t even look at me and all because of you not being able to handle your drinks. And you think that sorry is going to make everything better?” she shouted.“I dunno what to say!” he whispered.Mandy shook her head, “Well, I think you said enough last night. Now if you don’t mind, I am going to get my coffee and make one final attempt to get my husband back. The best thing you can do is move out of my way!” she hissed.Brian stepped to the side and let her leave. He closed his eyes and let his head bang softly against the wall, “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” he chanted to himself.5 minutes later he walked out and back to his desk.“Well?” asked Mark, raising his brows.Brian shook his head, “Don’t ask. Just don’t fucking ask!” he sighed.Mandy walked into the accounting department and headed straight towards Nicky’s office. She looked at the desk right in front and noticed Charlene was not there. She sighed and shook her head, trying to block out her thoughts. The door to Nicky’s office was slightly open and he could hear a conversation inside. She stopped just outside and listened.“No. You just don’t get it do you? He knows!” argued Nicky.“So what? Who is she going to believe? You: her husband, or him: a deranged loser?”“She suspects. I can tell. She has suspected about us for ages Charlie!” he snarled.“Then tell her, Nicky. Break it off. Tell her you love me!”“I cannot do that! She’ll be hurt. Oh god, I cannot even bear the thought. I cannot hurt her Char. She means the world to me!” sighed Nicky.“Do you love me?”“You know I do!”“Do you love her?”“Yes. She’s my wife isn’t she?”“You have to choose, Nicky. Her or me. You cannot have us both. It doesn’t quite work that way. This has been going on long enough, hasn’t it? You always said you would tell her as soon as the time was right. Well, the time has come, Nicky. I am making you make a choice here, coz I am not willing to share anymore!”“I know that and I want to tell her, but I don’t want to see that look of hurt on hr face when I do. Oh god, it will just kill me!” sighed Nicky.“Look Nicky. I am not going to force you to do anything, alright? I don’t want to get in the middle of anything. I want whatever decision you make to be yours, not ours. I don’t want to be any part in what you choose to do. But I want you to know, I will wait for you for as long as it takes. All I ask is, please tell me if I am wasting my time. Just let me know!”“You are not wasting your time. You know that. I love you. I want you…I’ll tell Mandy!” “Are you sure?”“Yes. I will tell her tonight ok? I promise!” he sighed.“Ok. I’d better get back to my desk then before…”Mandy didn’t hear anything else. She just covered her mouth and ran off. She was in a zombified state when she walked back to her department. Mark noticed her walking in, in that state and nudged Brian, who quickly looked at him. He saw the direction he was looking at and looked that way. His face fell and he guessed. He guessed she had found out.“OH god. Mandy!” he whispered. He got up and ran to her.“Mandy? What’s wrong?” he asked.Mandy walked in the same zombified state to the kitchen, put her mug back on the table, sat down and covered her face with her hands.“Babe. Just tell me. What’s happened?” asked Brian sitting opposite her and prying her hands off her face.Mandy looked at him with tears in her eyes, “You were right. My husband is cheating on me! He has someone else!”

the wrong kind of love #27

Chapter 27After a hard days work, Mandy went home and tidied up the house a bit. When she finally finished that, she sat with her feet up on the coffee table and watched telly. She then heard the front door opening and then closing. She put her feet down and lay down on the sofa.“Hey love. Only me!” called out Nicky.Mandy grinned and sat seductively on the sofa, hitching her skirt up slightly and rubbing her tanned thighs smoothly. She heard him coming in and licked her lips, “Hey lover! How about you give your darling wife some…” she stopped talking when she saw 4 faces staring back at her. She blushed and quickly smoothes her skirt down, sitting up straight, “Loving!” she finally added at the end of the sentence. She looked away and hoped the ground would swallow her up some time soon.“Erm, I just brought these guys over to review some files. Hope that’s ok!” he grimaced, looking uncomfortable.Mandy swallowed and nodded, “That’s fine. Yeah, no problem. I’ll just put the kettle on!”Nicky smiled and gave her a quick peck on the lips, “Thanks love!”“Are you hungry? Shall I make you all something to eat?” she offered.“Oh no. Don’t go into any trouble Mrs Byrne. We’re fine!” smiled Charlie.“Yeah don’t worry about it. We’ll pick something later on the way home!” smiled Fiona.“It’s no bother at all. Really!” insisted Mandy.“Really. We’re fine. We just had some snacks on the way over!” smiled Ashley.Mandy nodded, “How many coffees and how many teas then?”Everyone gave her their orders and soon enough she set about making them. She then walked to the dining room and placed the tray on the table. Everyone got their mug and continued working. Mandy walked away and sighed. She was happy that at least Nicky was home this evening, but she was so looking forward to spending some time with him alone. Last night when he got back he was too tired, so they didn’t get any quality time together. She hoped that tonight would be the night. She relaxed on the sofa again when she heard the doorbell ringing. She sighed, walked to the door and opened it. She stared at the figure standing opposite her.“Brian! What are you doing here?” she gasped.“I just wanted to give you this…” he said, handing her an earring she left behind at his place the last time, “…and this!” he added, as he put both hands on her face and kissed her lips hard. Mandy stumbled back when he let go of her and just stared at him.“What do you think you are doing?” she hissed softly, so that Nicky wouldn’t hear them. She closed the door behind her and folded her arms against her chest.“I love you, Mandy!” he slurred in his drunken stupour.“Brian, you’re drunk. Go home!” she rolled her eyes.“I may be drunk!” he said, swaying on the spot, “I may be drunk my darling, but I do know what I am doing!”With that he let out a soft chuckle.Mandy sighed, “What do you want Brian?”“You!” he quickly answered, pointing at her and letting his finger land on her stomach. He grabbed her face again to kiss her, but Mandy pulled away quickly before he managed it. He smirked and stared at her.“Don’t!” she spat.“Why not?” he slurred, getting closer to her and stumbling every now and then.“You know why not!” she sighed.“Oh that’s right. Coz you’re married!” he huffed, rolling his eyes.Mandy sighed, “Just go home, Brian, and sleep it off!”“He doesn’t love you, you know?” he hissed.“Goodnight Brian! And take care!” she sighed, opening the door again and walking in. She closed the door, leaned against it and closed her eyes, banging her head back on it gently. She could still hear him.“He does not care about you. He couldn’t give 2 shits about you, Mandy! It’s not you he really loves!” he shouted.Mandy furiously turned around and opened the door, looking at him with fire spitting out of her eyes, “Just who do you think you are, coming to my house and telling me that my husband does not love me. I do not appreciate your concern, brain, so just fuck off!” she shouted.“And I do not appreciate you sleeping with me and then wanting nothing to do with me. Life goes on honey. Move on!” he grinned, letting out a loud burp.“Will you keep your voice down?” she hissed.“Ooooh he’s home, is he?” he smirked.Mandy just rolled her eyes.Brian cupped his hands over his mouth, “Nicky. Oh Nicky!” he shouted.“Brian, what are you doing?” she hissed.“Come out, come out wherever you are!” he ignored her.2 seconds later, Nicky appeared behind Mandy, “What’s going on? What’s all this noise?” he asked looking at Mandy.“Oh, he’s just lost and got the wrong door!” smiled Mandy. Brian gave her a look as he swayed about. Nicky just stared at Brian.“Don’t I know you?” he asked, raising a brow.“Nope!” grinned Brian daftly, “And I don’t want to know you, thanks!” he answered, pulling a face of disgust!“What number are you looking for? I mean, what house?” asked Nicky in a sigh.“I am looking for this house and I am looking for your wife, now fuck off will you?” he grinned.“What?” shrieked Nicky.“Brian!” sighed Mandy.Nicky looked at Mandy, “That’s Brian?”Mandy sighed and nodded, wishing she could just disappear.“Well, I’m sorry mate, but she’s my wife!” laughed Nicky.“Yeah, coz you really care about her!” mumbled Brian, rolling his eyes.“I’m sorry. What did you say?” asked Nicky, leaning closer to him.“Whatever!” shrugged Brian, “You don’t love her anyway!”Nicky almost choked, “Eh?”“You don’t love your wife. You don’t treat her with the respect she deserves!” he growled.“Brian, just stop that!” scolded Mandy.Brian looked at her and grinned and then looked at Nicky.“What is he on about?” he asked, looking at Mandy.“He’ just drunk babe. Pay no attention to him!” she growled, giving Brian an evil stare.Nicky looked at Brian, “Look mate. I suggest you go home before I call the police!” he grabbed his arm and started escorting him out. Brian violently shook his hand away, “I am not your mate, and let go of me, you arsehole!”Nicky grabbed Mandy’s hand, dragged her inside and closed the door. He then looked at her, “If he doesn’t leave, call the cops and have him removed!” he grunted, walking away. Mandy jumped when she heard banging on the door.“Mandy. Come back here!” he shouted, “Come out!”Mandy blocked his shouts and sat on the sofa, every now and then looking at the front door.“He doesn’t love you. Not like I do. Come here!” he continued yelling and banging on the door.Mandy sighed loudly and swayed back and forth,hoping he would get tired and leave. After a couple of minutes or more banging and yelling, Mandy saw Nicky marching in front of her.“For fucks sake, won’t he just fucking leave?” he shouted, furiously opening the door.“Ok, don’t say I didn’t warn you. I am calling the cops on you now!” he growled, picking the phone from the hall table.“Nicky!” gasped Mandy, running towards him.“I don’t give a fuck who you are calling. You are nothing but a big huge fucking dickhead who does not give a flying fuck about his wife!” snarled Brian.Nicky hung up the phone and banged it on the table. He left it there and walked closer to him, “What the fuck did you just call me?”Mandy ran towards Nicky and grabbed his arm, “Nicky no. Come back!”Nicky furiously broke away from her grip and looked menacingly at Brian.“You should listen to your wife, mate!” he grinned.Nicky looked at Mandy, “He called me a fucking dickhead Mandy. I am not putting up with that!” he shrieked.“He’s pissed Nicky. Just ignore him!” she soothes, rubbing his back.Nicky relaxed and took a step back.“Awww what’s the matter, dickhead? Won’t she let you out to play?” pouted Brian.Mandy and Nicky both looked at him, “Brian, stop winding him up and just go home will you?” she screamed.“And leave you alone with the dickhead? Not bloody likely. Why don’t you come with me? I can show you what a REAL man is like! I know what you want. I know what you like. He cannot give you what you want. I mean, he is not giving you any at all, is he?” he grinned.Nicky walked closer to him, “I am warning you!”“Oh you are, are you? And what are you gonna do? Call the cops and what then? Tell on me? You knob!” he grinned.Nicky pulled a face and punched Brian right on the jaw. Brian looked at him, shocked before he retaliated and punched Nicky back. Soon they were both in a scrambled heap on the lawn. Mandy hovered around them, not knowing what to do!“Nicky! Brian! Stop it!” she screamed.Nicky’s workmates came running out to see what all the fuss was about. Mandy almost cringed when she saw all the neighbours looking out of the windows. Never in her life had she been so embarrassed. She lived in a quiet, although nosy neighbourhood and she had never been the centre of attention since she moved in. She cringed at the thought of being the topic of conversation the next day in most of these surrounding houses.“Please. Do something!” begged Mandy to Nicky’s housemates.Ashley stepped in and grabbed Nicky, pulling him back inside, as Mandy stood in front of Brian. Brian panted, stared at Nicky and wiped the blood from his lip. Mandy saw his chest heaving as he panted heavily.“I’ll et you next time!” shouted Nicky, “I am not finished with you yet!”Ashley took him into the living room, out of sight while Mandy stayed outside. She kept staring at Brian furiously.“Mandy, please listen to me!” he started.Mandy folded her arms and just stared, too angry to speak for the fear of what would come out of her mouth.“I am sorry, but he hit me first. I wasn’t going to just take it!” he shook his head as he continued swaying.Unamused, Mandy turned around, walked back into the house. Giving Brian a very disapproving look, she closed the door to her house without uttering a single word. From the looks she had given him, he knew that she never wanted to speak to him or even see him again. He sighed, bowed his head down, kicked the lamppost in a temper and stormed off, stumbling all the way home!

the wrong kind of love #26

Chapter 26

When Nicky left, Brian got up and walked over to Mandy.
“What did he want?” he growled, towering over her.
Mandy looked up at him, dumbfounded, “What’s it to you?” she gasped.
Brian shrugged, tutted and walked away moodily. Mandy was still too shocked by his behaviour and continued staring at him as he walked away. She finally snapped back to reality and answered the call.
“Hey Bri. How do you fancy going to the pub after work?” called out Mark, stuffing a doughnut down his face.
Brian looked at him, “What about Fina and the kids?” he asked.
“Well, she can come too if she wants, but don’t you think the kids are too young?” he shrugged.
Brian rolled his eyes, “No, you ponce. I mean, won’t she mind?” he sighed.
“She is at her mum’s today. She won’t be home until around 8!” he shrugged, “I am sure she won’t mind!”
“Well, in that case, ok. I’m in!” he smiled. He looked at Sam and grinned, “What about you Sammie? Fancy pubbing after work?”
Sam looked at him and shook her head, “Sorry lads. Shane is picking me up after work!”
“So? Bring him with you!” answered Mark.
“Nah. I already promised him that we’d go to the movies. He has been on and on at me to go and watch a flick with him for a weeks now. Maybe another time eh?” she smiled.
Brian winked at her and looked at Mark, “I guess it’s just me and thee!”
“More drinks for us!” grinned Mark.
Mandy hung up the phone when she saw a woman standing in front of her. She had a baby in her arms. She must have been just a few weeks old, she guessed.
“Hi. May I help you?” she asked, with a smile pasted on her face. She looked at the baby asleep in her arms and smiled even bigger.
“Hmm, yes please. Is Mark Feehily here please?” she asked.
Mandy looked back, “Well, he was here a second ago. Hang on. I’ll go and look for him. Who is asking for him?”
“OH just tell him its his wife!” she smiled, cradling the baby in her arms.
Mandy smiled and went inside the corridor. She stopped by the kitchen and opened the door. Mark and Brian quickly stopped chatting and turned around to look at her. Mandy looked at the pair of them. They looked like naughty little schoolboys who had just been caught out smoking.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
Mark grinned, “Nothing. Just having a chat, that’s all!”
Mandy looked at Brian, who immediately looked at the ground.
“Oh. Alright then. I just came over to tell you your wife is there asking for you!” she said.
“Ok, great!” smiled Mark, “Tell her I’ll be right over. Just want to finish my coffee!”
Mandy nodded and walked back to the main hall. She sat at her desk and looked at Fina, “He’ll be right over. He is just finishing his coffee!” she explained.
“Thanks!” smiled Fina.
Mandy looked at the sleeping baby again, “She’s gorgeous! How old is she?”
Fina smiled at her and then looked at her sleeping baby, “Thank you. She looks just like her daddy!”
Mandy smiled and nodded.
“She’s only 3 weeks old!” added Fina.
Mandy smiled and saw a little girl, of around 3 walking around her desk. She tapped Mandy on the knee and looked up at her. Mandy looked down at her and smiled, “Hello there!”
“Hello. My name is Tammy and I am 3!” she grinned, holding up 4 fingers. This made Mandy chuckle slightly.
“Well, hello Tammy. My name is Mandy, and I am…too old!”
Fina smiled and shook her head, “Sorry about her!”
Mandy smiled and shook her head, “Mark is my daddy!” she babbled.
Mandy smiled, “Yes, I know. You look like him too!”
“Both of them have been blessed with their father’s looks!” laughed Fina.
“Do you work with my daddy?” she questioned, looking up at her.
“Why, yes. I do!” smiled Mandy.
“Tammy. Sop bothering that lady and come here!” sighed Fina. She then looked at Mandy, “Sorry. She may have her father’s appearance, but she has my character and will talk non stop for hours.”
Mandy laughed, “It’s ok. She’s no bother!”
Fina smiled and bounced the baby in her arms as she started crying.
“Great!” she moaned, “Why is Mark taking so long? Emma’s getting hungry!”
“Want me to go and get him again?” offered Mandy.
Fina shook her head, “No, don’t worry. But could you...I mean, would you mind holding Emma for a second? I need to find her dummy!” she said, struggling with the bag tossed over her shoulder.
Mandy jumped at the chance. She quickly got up and held Emma in her arms. She looked at her, crying and bounced her in her arms. Fina searched the baby bag for a dummy. Mandy looked at Emma and smiled, trying to calm her down. Just as Fina grabbed a dummy from the bag, Mark and Brian walked back in.
“Sweet Jesus!” gasped Brian, slapping Mark’s shoulder and stopping.
“What?” asked Mark, trying to follow his gaze. Brian watched as Mandy bounced Emma in her arms and smiled at her. His mouth was wide open. She looked like a natural mum, even if she wasn’t one yet. It really suited her. He could really picture her with a baby in her arms. His baby, he dreamed.
“Look at her. Look at her holding your daughter, Mark. Now how good would she look holding her own baby?” he fantasized.
“Brian, you’re obsessed, mate. You need to get a life, man!” he chuckled.
“I do have a life. It would be better if she was in it though!” he mumbled, walking to his desk.
“Daddy!” shouted Tammy, running towards her father. Mark turned around and scooped her in his strong arms, kissing her, “Hello sweetheart!”
“Mummy is taking me to Nanny Slater’s!” she boasted.
“I know, pet!” he smiled, “Are you being a good girl for Mummy?”
She nodded slowly and put her finger in her mouth shyly.
“Tammy!” warned Fina.
Tammy looked innocently at her father and bowed her head down with a shy smile.
Fina sighed, “Tell Daddy what you did!”
Mark sighed and looked sternly at Tammy, “What did you do?”
“I painted picture for you, on the wall!” she mumbled.
Mark looked at Fina, trying his hardest not to laugh.
“Don’t you dare laugh!” she hissed.
Mark shook his head and looked back at Tammy, “We have been over this time and time again. What does Daddy keep telling you?”
“Not to paint on the walls!” she mumbled with her finger still in her mouth.
“Where do you paint?” he further questioned.
“On paper!” she added, looking down at the floor.
“Good. Now next time don’t forget!” he smiled, kissing her and putting her back down on the floor. He leaned over, kissed Fina gently on the lips and then kissed Emma’s forehead delicately.
“You ok, love?” he asked.
“Yeah. We just came over to see you before we go to mum’s!” she smiled.
Brian looked at them and couldn’t help feeling envious. This is what he wanted. A woman to love and a woman who would love him back and give him happiness and a family. He sighed and continued working at his computer, every now and then looking over at Mandy. He heard Fina saying goodbye and then looked at Mark. Mark looked at him as he made his way back to the desk. He smiled at him.
“Don’t talk to me. I hate you!” Brian growled jokingly to him.
“What did I do?” laughed Mark, holding his arms up defensively.
“You have everything I want in life. A good woman. 2 gorgeous kids and a nice home. What do I have? An annoying housemate, his loud girlfriend and his incredibly annoying pet dog to keep me company!” he moaned.
“Oh don’t you start feeling sorry for yourself, McFadden, or you’ll be going to that pub alone!” smiled Mark.
“Yeah, coz I have never done that before!” he sighed, rolling his eyes. He smiled at Mark as he picked up a paper and went to the photocopying room. 5 minutes later, Mandy walked in, needing to copy some forms. Brian looked at her and sighed, “I won’t be much longer!”
“Take as much time as you need, Brian. You got here first!” she shrugged.
“How are you finding it here?” he asked, trying to make small talk.
“It’s alright!” shrugged Mandy, “I’m coping!”
“Boring huh?” he asked, looking at the papers feeding on the tray.
“Not really. It sure beats staying at home, staring at the same 4 walls day in and day out!” she shrugged.
Brian nodded and got the paper out of the tray, “All yours!” he mumbled, turning around and grabbing the copies. As he did so, Mandy walked and stood behind him, ready to use the machine. As he turned around again, unaware that Mandy was right behind him, he bumped straight into her. He grabbed her arms to steady himself and her and they stared into each other’s eyes. He felt her chest pressed on his and swallowed hard as he stared deep into her eyes.
“Sorry!” they both said unanimously.
Brian laughed, blushing slightly, “My fault. I should have looked where I was going!”
“No, I shouldn’t; have been standing so close to you!” she smiled, “Totally my fault.”
Brian stared at her, both of them unaware that they were still pressed into each other’s chests.
Brian looked at her for a little while and cleared his throat, “I’ll, er…I’ll see you outside!” he pulled away, stepped aside and walked away. Mandy sighed when he left and finally let all the tension she had inside of her out with that sigh. She looked at him walking away, shook her head and then set about Making her copies

the wrong kind of love #25

Chapter 25

Brian was gone for a while, but when he came back, he did not seem too happy. Mandy looked at him as she answered yet another call and then looked away. Brian stared at her, shook his head and carried on walking.
“Brian!” Mandy called out to him. He turned around and looked at her with a frown pasted on his face.
“Call for you. It’s James!” she said.
He flinched slightly and rushed to his desk, “Sure. Pass him onto my phone!” he sighed. He sat down and waited for the phone to ring. He looked at Mandy as she busily searched the book for his name and internal number.
“32, Mandy!” he shouted.
Mandy nodded and transferred the call. She hang up and immediately took another call. Brian’s phone started ringing and he quickly answered it.
“James. Talk to me!” he smiled.
He listened for a while and looked at Mandy, “Are you serious? Who is it? You are kidding. Tell me you are kidding…so it’s not….OH Jesus Christ!” he whispered, looking at Mandy again, who was busily answering more calls. He turned around again and leaned closer to the phone, “James. You are sure about this, right?” he asked. Then he nodded and sighed, “Right ok mate. I owe you one. No, I am not doing anything about it yet. Cannot bear it, that’s why.”
He hung up and played with his lips for a while, deep in thought. He suddenly sighed, shook his head and continued with his work. A few minutes later, he saw Mandy taking her head set off and standing up. He quickly stood up and walked towards her.
“Where are you going?”
“To pay my husband a visit. What’s it to you?” she asked moodily.
“You cannot leave to see your husband!” he argued, “Simon will have your hide!”
“I can do what I like. It’s my coffee break!” she smirked. She quickly turned around and walked out. Brian panicked. He had to do something. He looked around himself and ran to his phone, quickly dialling a number.
“James. She is on her way up, mate. Please, please make sure the coast is clear. Do something. I dunno create a diversion or something. I dunno just think of something, please!” he sighed.
He hung up and bit his lip nervously.
Mandy walked out of the lift and walked towards the door. She knocked lightly on it and made her way in.
“Mandy. What are you doing here?” gasped Nicky.
Mandy stared at him. He looked really flustered, but she smiled, “Oh I thought I’d come and see you during my coffee break!” she grinned, walking towards him and kissing his lips quickly.
“Coffee break? What coffee break? Break from what?” he asked confused.
Mandy grinned and sat on his lap, “I wanted to surprise you. I have a job!”
“A job? That’s great sweetheart!” he grinned, “Where?”
“Here!” she squealed, bouncing slightly on his lap, “I work in the advertising department at customer services!”
Nicky’s smile faded very quickly and he tugged nervously on his collar, “Y-You work here? As in K&G Agency here?” he shrieked.
Mandy bit her lip and nodded with a huge grin on her face, “I had my interview on Monday and I started this morning. Great huh?” she grinned.
Nicky smiled and nodded, “That’s…Fabulous honey!” he smiled, hugging her.
“Now I don’t have to be away from you all the time. I can see you more!” she laughed.
“Yeah, that’s…great!” he said with a pause.
“I knew you’d be pleased. Anyway, I have to get going now. Break’s over. I have to go and answer some more calls. See you later babe. Wanna meet up for Lunch or something?” she asked, walking to the door after kissing him.
“Oh erm, I am having a working lunch today. Got loads to sort out after the conference and everything. Sorry babe!” he grimaced.
Mandy smiled and nodded, “No problem babe. We’ll do it another time then!”
She blew him and kiss as she walked out. Brian was sat at his desk, looking over at the door at all times. She was bound to come back soon, and he was desperate to know what she had seen. He nervously jumped up every time someone walked in and sighed when he saw it wasn’t her.
Mandy casually walked back into her department, sat at her desk and put her headset back on. Brian looked at her, jumped up and walked over to her.
“Is everything ok?” he asked, “Are you ok?”
“Yeah. Why shouldn’t I be?” she asked, looking up at him curiously, taking her headset off.
“Oh, no reason!” he shrugged, “Just wondering, is all!”
Mandy sighed, “Brian, you have not wanted to talk to me for the past few days and acted as cold as ice around me, just coz you have the hump coz I am not leaving my husband, and all of a sudden you seem very interested in what I am doing, where I am going and how I am? What’s it all about?”
Brian looked at her and bit his lip. He had to think quick, “I dunno. You just looked a bit down and I wanted to know if you were ok!”
“Well, I am fine, thanks for your concern. But right now, I have some calls to answer, so if you don’t mind!” she sighed, putting her headset back on.
Brian walked away and sighed, “Fine!” How he wished he hadn’t gone through all that trouble. That he would have gone with his original plan.
Half an hour alter, Brian looked up from his computer when he heard someone walking in. He couldn’t stop staring. He immediately knew who it was. He stood in front of Mandy’s table and waited for her to finish speaking on the phone. She looked up at him and smiled.
“Nicky!” she greeted him, jumping up and wrapping her arms around his neck.
Nicky smiled, grabbed her hands and removed them from his neck, giving her a kiss on her lips.
Sam leaned closer to Brian, “Who’s that?”
“That’s her husband!” he whispered back in a growl.
“Wow. Cute!” she grinned.
“Arsehole!” he spat, folding his arms and continuing to stare at them as they talked.
Sam looked at him and snorted loudly “Don’t like him much I take it!”
Brian just couldn’t stop staring at him as he talked to her, “He is treating her like crap and she is so much in denial about it!”
“Treating her like crap? IN what way? He is knocking her about?” she gasped.
Brian shook his head, “Nah. He is just sleeping around!” he answered.
“Oh my god. Was that what all the questions were about earlier? Who is he sleeping with? Anyone from here? Anyone we know?” she gasped.
Brian almost laughed. Typical Sam, always wanted in on the gossip.
Brian shook his head, “I don’t know who it is yet, but I am trying to find out!”
“Then how do you know he is…” she started.
“I just know!” he growled.
Sam stared at him, “Does she know?”
Brian gave her a look, “Does it look like she knows?”
“Well no, but…” she sighed.
“She has her suspicions and she suspects who it could be with, but right now she refuses to believe it and says it is all in her imagination. I am trying to get some proof though and I am this close!” he whispered.
“Who does she suspect it is?” she asked with her mouth wide open.
“Oh, our lovely Cheap Charlene. NO shame, that girl!” he growled.
Sam nodded, “Well, you heard the rumours about her being involved with married man, right?”
Brian sighed and nodded, “That’s why I wanna find out for sure!”
“Why?” she asked, “I mean, what has it got to do with you? and why are you so set on finding out?”
Brian sighed and stared viciously at Nicky, “Coz Mandy is far too nice a person to be treated like that. That guy so does not deserve someone like Mandy. She is far too good for him!”
Sam smiled, “Looks like someone has a little crush on someone!” she sang.
Brian looked at her, “get serious, will ya?” he growled.
“Oh, so you don’t think she would be better off with you then?” she tested him, raising a brow.
Brian sighed and stared back at Mandy, “I would never hurt her or treat her like he does. He does not appreciate her enough and that’s just…wrong!”
“Brian, honey! Don’t get involved. You will only end up getting hurt and she will not like you much for it!” she advised.
“Yeah well, she don’t like me much at the moment anyway. I have nothing to lose really. I am going to prove to her that her darling husband is not as honest as he makes out to be. Even if she ends up hating my fucking guts, he will not make a fool out of her. No matter what it takes!” he growled, staring menacingly at Nicky and sitting back down.